Handling the Aftermath of Gossip

POSTED 07 09 2019

Handling the Aftermath of Gossip

Have you ever felt victimized, harmed, or betrayed by the gossip and harsh judgments of a family member, friend, partner, or co-worker?

It can be disconcerting – perplexing, at times – to witness the seemingly lack of character and integrity in others. Those closest to you can be a great supporter one minute, and the next it feels like they’ve stabbed you in the back.

why does this happen?

At times, it's possible that people feel envious, frustrated, or out of control, especially when they’re unable to control others. They may feel the need to do something that will help them feel better about themselves. Like a drug, gossiping may give them a temporary sense of control, feeling of importance and/or satisfaction.

It is common knowledge that people who are feeling insecure, angry, or out for some sort of revenge, will often put others down and break confidences. Unfortunately, this sort of behavior can and will wreak tremendous havoc on not just themselves, but their victim.

Gossip manipulates people into taking sides. Those who listen to gossip - and REPEAT it - create even further destruction and escalate the damage.

So, how do we deal with toxic people and the aftermath of gossip?

When someone gossips about us, we need to determine how valuable that relationship is to us. Where do we draw the line?

1. If we value the relationship: Calm, kind words to express how their behaviors made you feel is necessary. The success of your efforts will quickly be known by their response, their tone, and their words. If they're understanding, apologetic, and kind, then you've made progress. If not, at least you took the high road and tried.

2. If someone continues to betray you: For your own self-preservation, distance yourself from them, if not eliminate them from your life entirely. Hold your head up high and know you deserve better. Victims of gossip and judgment may feel as though they are not enough. On the contrary, those who disrespect or hurt you in any way are showing you they are not good enough for YOU.

3. Hurt people hurt people. Gossip reveals character (or, lack thereof); it does not define yours. With this in mind, it’s easier to not take the behaviors of others personally. Resist feeling defeated, or cynical.

4. Surround yourself with positive people who build you up and who are loyal to you - regardless. Spend time with those who are authentic, and can speak to you directly (and kindly) if they're having a problem with you. Those who treat you with respect, and who can keep your confidences are valuable gifts. Cherish them.

5. Don’t hang on to anger and grudges. Negative emotions are merely burning embers in the heart that will disrupt your peace, well-being, and that will interfere with your productivity and purpose. The best response to those who wound you over and over again, is to protect yourself, wish them well, and walk away. Life is simply too short not to.

6. Betrayal and gossip are forms of rejection. But, remember....rejection is Protection. Embrace and be thankful for it!

Join our movement and help us raise awareness about the damages of gossip. Together, we can make a positive difference - one kind word, one less judgment at a time...

Articles & Inspiration